Etiquette Question

[DirtyHarry]

As the subject suggests, this is more of an etiquette question. I just didn't know where else to ask it. It is a question about an ongoing game, but it is not a strategy question, and I'm not naming names or game numbers or anything like that. So hopefully the question isn't out of line.

Anyway, the questions is, I'm country A, and I decided to ally with country B to attack country C. Now, as you would expect, country C is making overtures about A (me) switching alliances. Since I have no intention of doing that at this point, I have ignored the requests so far, but would it be better to just respond politely that I'm not interested? I admire country C for continuing to try to work and fight, but the die is cast.

Thoughts?

[Carebear]

As the subject suggests, this is more of an etiquette question. I just didn't know where else to ask it. It is a question about an ongoing game, but it is not a strategy question, and I'm not naming names or game numbers or anything like that. So hopefully the question isn't out of line.

Anyway, the questions is, I'm country A, and I decided to ally with country B to attack country C. Now, as you would expect, country C is making overtures about A (me) switching alliances. Since I have no intention of doing that at this point, I have ignored the requests so far, but would it be better to just respond politely that I'm not interested? I admire country C for continuing to try to work and fight, but the die is cast.

Thoughts?

Up to you. But, I think communication is better than non-communication. You never know how things can change in the future, better to have the lines of communication open.

[Eleusinian]

I personally find the ignoring approach really annoying, especially since there's no way for me to know whether the other person even read my message. Is this person busy IRL? Just not interested in any discussions, because they want to play this gunboat-style? Not interested in my offer, and being passive-aggressive about telling me? If I resend the message, am I helpfully reminding them about the game, or talking to a wall like an idiot?

Let me put it another way: If someone asked you to do something in real life, and you didn't want to do it, would you (a) politely but firmly tell them no, or (b) stare dead ahead and pretend you didn't even hear them?

The (b) approach is pretty common in my (limited) experience on PlayDip, but imo it makes the game significantly less fun. (And to Carebear's point, someone who does makes the game less fun for me is going to have to work that much harder to make it worthwhile for me to work with them later, if the situation changes.)

[MichaelG]

In general, you want to keep talking. You may not have a lot to say, but at least acknowledge the messages. There may sometimes be reasons to go silent (such as if you want someone to think you might NMR), but usually it's better to keep talking, even if you're not offering any hope that you might switch sides. Keeping lines of communication open may prove helpful if you do need to work with C later.

However, be aware that switching sides to work with C and stab B can be very effective. In fact, C may be thinking the same thing and preparing to stab you when B is weak. Sometimes going for the kill is less effective than turning your nearly-dead enemy into your vassal.

Another trick you might try is to offer to switch sides - but then don't. If C believes you, he may throw much of his remaining strength at B, allowing you to get the lion's share of the spoils. Use that trick very sparingly, though, as it could greatly damage your credibility for the rest of the game - and potentially in later games with the same players. You don't want to be seen as someone who will lie and stab merely for the sake of an SC or two. A stab that leads to a solo or a serious run at one doesn't bother people or damage your credibility as much as a stab that doesn't really gain you much in the long run.

[ColonelApricot]

Etiquette is just another tool you can use to make friends and influence people (a platitude meaning to destroy them).

[asudevil]

Also if you are nice enough...they may throw you a solo.

[DirtyHarry]

Wow - great advice - thanks folks.

[Carebear]

Also if you are nice enough...they may throw you a solo.

I have been a recipient of that more than once.

[Malarky]

If this is a question of etiquette rather than strategy then there is no etiquette about answering messages.

Or there there shouldn't be, at least.

The strategy has been pointed out from one side above but there is the other side - deliberately not answering a message.

I'm sure someone will come up with an equivalent in f2f Dip but I suggest that it is in the remote game - playing at a distance - that deliberately ignoring messages comes really into its own.

So, it depends what you want to achieve whether you answer messages or not. And I think this means that any etiquette goes out the window.

[WHSeward]

Gotta say I disagree with you Nibbler. This is a game. A social activity. A lot of etiquette applies.

Lot's of people think that since they are anonymous on the internet, it is OK to be a jerk. They are wrong. They are just jerks.

In this particular case, not replying to a message is rude. If you have diplomatic reason that you want to be rude, I suppose you can do that, just understand that it comes at cost.